From: Berhane Habtemariam (Berhane.Habtemariam@gmx.de)
Date: Sun Aug 30 2009 - 06:30:56 EDT
POSITIVE THOUGHT FOR POSITIVE EXPECTATION
Dr. Tesfa G. Gebremedhin, West Virginia University
30/08/2009
It is commonly observed that positive thoughts bring positive things to
people. In history, it is also well documented that positive expectations,
as the result of positive thoughts, have helped people recover from numerous
health conditions and encouraged them to develop positive attitudes in life.
We need to have positive thoughts because the world is disgusted with our
utter ignorance, morbid doubts, and wicked practices. We need to talk about
mutual understanding and cooperation because the world is sad enough without
our animosity and enmity. We should not deplore our community and depress
those around us by dwelling on our minor aches and pains because everyone
like us is carrying some baggage of woes and misgivings. At times, we may be
entitled to be upset and frustrated, but that does not give us the right to
upset those around us and create hostility and turmoil in our community and
religious institutions. The following instances will illustrate the
importance of having positive thoughts in life:
Two middle-aged Eritreans were walking down a crowded sidewalk in
Washington, DC. Suddenly, one of the men exclaimed, "Listen to the sound of
the birds." However, the second man could not hear a thing. He asked his
friend how he could hear the sound of the birds in the midst of all the
noises of the people and the rush hour of the street traffic. The first man
explained to his friend that people have two choices when it comes to
listening: to listen with positive expectations or to listen with negative
expectations or judgment. How we think shapes how we listen, and how we
listen shapes how we speak. Listening to others with judgment is the worst
behavior we encounter among ourselves in our community. Once a judgment is
in place in our minds, we listen for what we want to hear, not for what it
is. If we judge a person as stupid or ignorant, we listen for anything about
the person that supports this negative expectation. Likewise, if we judge a
person as wise and intelligent, we listen for everything about the person
that suggests this positive expectation. Thus, it is the privilege of wisdom
to listen with respect.
Many of us in a community meeting do not have the respect to listen to each
other. We do not really care to listen to a person who is talking in a
meeting. We are either speaking or preparing to speak at the same time. Too
often, we prepare responses (most of the time negative) while somebody is
still talking. Most of us do not seek first to understand because we do not
listen with the intent to understand; we usually listen with the intent to
reply. Usually, most of our interpersonal communication in our community
affairs is ignored or misunderstood because we do not listen carefully to
what is being said. That is mostly the reason we have enormous and nonsense
quarrels, squabbles, and conflicts in our communities and religious
institutions. We need to understand that listening is the first rule and
initial duty for effective interpersonal communication and understanding. We
need to listen with our ears for the meaning of what is said; listen with
our eyes for understanding the behavior of the person; and listen with our
hearts for feeling the emotions of the speaker. As Winston Churchill said,
"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it
takes to sit down and listen." However, the less we speak, the more we
listen and understand each other. If we are good listeners, our ears will
never get us in trouble for listening. But wisdom is the reward we get for a
lifetime of listening.
Another instance of positive thinking is the story of a large passenger ship
which was crossing the Atlantic Ocean from New York to London. The Atlantic
Ocean which had been so blue and peaceful early in the afternoon suddenly
became a black and angry sea in the late afternoon. The sea was dashed with
foam and white caps. The terrible storm sent most of the passengers to their
staterooms for safety. Some of the less fearful passengers gathered in small
groups along the deck of the ship to watch what was going on. As one of the
officers of the ship passed by the deck, one of the scared passengers asked
him, "Do you think we are going to have a bad and stormy night?" The ship
officer replied. "Yes, I think it will be quite stormy." Then the officer
added reassuringly, "But there is nothing to worry about the storm. We have
a fine ship, plenty of sea rooms and strong life rafts." Just then a vivid
flash lightened the foaming sky. The same nervous passenger exclaimed, "Look
at the storm!" The officer countered, "No, you don't have to look at the
storm, look at the ship!" Then, very calmly, the officer proceeded to tell
the same passenger how well the ship was constructed and how it would be
able to ride out any storm. Though the officer did not minimize the
difficulty they might face with the storm, he had firm faith in his reliable
vessel. He was confident that the ship was sufficient and strong enough to
withstand any storm from an angry sea. We, too, must face all types of
roadblocks and obstacles and in the operation of our community and religious
institutions. Obviously, we would not escape from all kinds of agitations in
our community because it is a normal evolution to pass through such hurdles
in life. What is important is to have strength to face adversity with
courage no matter how heavy and strong the storms hit the foundation of our
community. The secret of weathering the storms of life successfully is to
look at the strength of the community instead of its limitations. Instead of
looking at our troubles and being overcome by fear and anxiety, we need to
have incredible strength of character and the spirit of courage that can
positively make a difference in our community affairs. Thus, our community
is the only social affair that can bring us all together in unity
irrespective of our differences in our religious and political affiliations.
We also find an excellent example of the truth of positive thought in the
Gospel. When Peter saw Jesus Christ walking on the water, he said, "Lord, if
it is you, bid me come to you on the water." Jesus asked him to come. So,
Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water to come to Jesus; but when
he saw the wind he was afraid and he begun to sink in the water. It was then
that he cried out to Jesus Christ, "Lord, save me." Peter's difficulty was
that he took his eyes off Christ. He got into trouble because he looked at
the water waves and at his own fearful heart. He should have kept his eyes
to look to Jesus Christ, who was beckoning to him because Jesus can calm
even the stormiest sea. The point is that many of us like Peter become so
preoccupied with our fears and doubts that we forget to look at the possible
solutions of our problems. In most instances, we are very quick in making
judgments and get obsessed in exaggerating and magnifying the magnitude of
our petty problems in our communities instead of looking at the solutions of
our troubles. We need to understand that where there is unity there is
always success because in unity there is strength and purpose. Even the weak
threads become strong when they are united. Thus, we cannot be separated by
religion nor divided by politics; we should stand united in harmony and
integrity in our own communities and religious instituti